joyful

J is For Joyful #DecodingMidlife

Joyful, an adjective means feeling, expressing, or causing great pleasure or happiness.

Life could be complicated and chaotic during the midlife. Hence, feeling joyful could be challenging during those years.

When you are young you are full of vigour and optimism. You are determined and focused on life goals. However, during your midlife age, you realize that you haven’t achieved what you want to and that these were not realistic goals. You might have set very high standards for yourself. Such thoughts do transpire in the minds of many women once they approach midlife.

Priorities change with marriage and motherhood. This could be a conscious choice made by you. I am not suggesting that it’s forced always. I made a choice that I want to spend time with my daughter in her growing years. It was a personal choice. I was not sacrificing anything. Yet now that I am approaching midlife, I was feeling incompetent and that did affect my otherwise joyful nature.

Behavioural changes are required if you want to lead a joyful life during midlife. You can’t just keep sitting and thinking about how it would be being you had a better job, better salary, better health etc. You need to make some behavioural and mindset changes to experience happiness in your life.

Here, I would like to share some of the things I plan to incorporate into my lifestyle and which I already have to lead a joyful life.

Take a moment and breathe:

My new Apple watch reminds me many times during the day to take time off from whatever I am doing and observe my breath for at least one minute. Sadly, I need the gadget to remind me this, but concentrating on my breath has had a huge impact on my mood. Now whenever I feel irritated, I close my eyes, inhale deeply and exhale. This exercise relaxes your muscles, increases energy levels and decreases the feeling of stress.

Spend time with friends and parents:

As you reach your midlife, your children are grown up and are living an independent life. As you near late 40’s they might leave home for further studies too. That is when the empty nest syndrome creeps in. This is the time you reconnect with your friends as it makes you feel joyful. I would also suggest spending more time with your parents. It’s role reversal time. Your parents need you now as they age. Dine with them, take them for an outing. Giving them joy is going to make you feel very joyful too.

Be Grateful:

There would be many things which would not be going right in your life but focus on those which are. Create a gratitude jar. Once you make this a habit, you experience many more joyful moments.

Encourage, motivate, support others:

Nothing else gives more joy than being a strong support to others who need you. When you are down, these people will help to get you up and going. And mind well how much you prepare yourself to keep anxiety at bay during midlife, it will come to haunt you. So, keep yourself surrounded by happy people who encourage and motivate you. They will make you feel so much better, so much richer. And that will happen only when you create such a circle of people around you through your joyful deeds.

Midlife is a transition and it’s in your hands to make it joyful. Look at it as a happy journey.

There is no destination. The journey is all that there is, and it can be very, very joyful.

  • Srikumar Rao

 

15 comments

  1. My take away from this post is “take a moment and breath”. And I practiced it right after reading it. And now commenting after feeling so refreshed! It works

  2. Life doesn’t always turn out the way you wanted to. You end up not doing a lot of stuff you wanted to. So true. You need to stop, breathe, reflect, and change and adapt and get back to yourself. Only then one can be joyful.

  3. I was thinking of the same. that its high time my parents stop rescuing me and I do something for them now. hopefully moving closer to them will enable me to do that.

  4. Honestly I try not to think about midlife. For me it is the famous line from Deewar “hum jaha khade hote hai, line wahin se shuru hoti hain.” So this is where I stand and this is the beginning. Good post A

  5. Mid life can be challenging – I agree there is no point sitting and drowning in sorrows of a life that could have been richer, more full and bright. Take what you have and create something beautiful, each day will seem exciting. I am loving your series Aesha!

  6. A beautiful, mature life lesson. Yes, things will change in the next decade and we need to think ahead and be prepared for that phase.

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