enjoy parenting

5 Tips To Enjoy Parenting Teens

Enjoy parenting your teens? Is it even possible?

Teenage is confusing and so is parenting our teens. This age has the power to make both parents and children drive up against the wall. This has been said many times and experienced by all parents across the world. We have heard so many negative stories around teenage parenting that we start believing that its something we need to just face and go through but not to enjoy.

However, I feel I will be able to enjoy my daughter’s teen years rather than in her childhood years. Because now I can communicate easily with her. She understands me, though she might behave aloof and show arrogance in her behaviour to just prove her point. I know somewhere she knows that I have her best interests in my mind and that most of the times I am right (wink).

Let’s discuss how can we make out time with our teens If you know what to expect, you can put it in perspective, relax, and enjoy your teenager!

 

Here are a few tips on how you can enjoy teen parenting:

 

Play a sport or do activities along with your teen

 

I was of the impression that once my daughter is all grown up, I will have all the time to myself because then I would not have to spend too much time with her playing something or doing various activities with her. But how wrong was I? She once complained that I do not play now with her and that made me realise, that she wants to spend time with me. So now we play badminton at least thrice a week. We play scrabble and also paint together. I have to just get her now to read together because she doesn’t do and finds excuses.

 

Give them your undivided attention

 

Listen. When they are back from school and want to share stuff with you, listen. Do not start lecturing them on first changing their uniform or eating lunch. I was doing that. Stop doing whatever you are to listen to them because they will have stories to share. If you really want your teen shares with you, start this practice when they are in pre-teenage. Because that’s the age when they actually want to share everything about their school time with us. Make the most of this opportunity of sharing your teenage stories when they are sharing school crush gossips. This will make them open up about their relationships and trust you. By not judging them they get a message that you treat them as an individual and respect their ideas. By giving them your undivided attention you may find that they will actually begin listening to you. This will make your communication with your teen a two-way process and you will also get a chance to relive your teenage years plus enjoy the teen parenting process.

 

Give them time to open up at their will

 

Do not pester them to share everything with you. They will eventually when they are ready. Do not ask too many questions when you feel they are stressed or worked up about something. Just let them calm down, give them time to unwind and I am sure they will come to you. Because if you do this, you will unnecessarily stress yourself too, be worried about them and not actually enjoy their teen years.

 

Having frequent family dinners

 

Family dinner is a great way to enjoy teen parenting. Eating dinner together as a family should be a gadget-free time. This will provide a good opportunity to listen and talk to your teen. It is a great method to stay engaged with your teen’s lives and make them feel loved and important. Research shows that having family dinners help in dealing with stress better as well. So, it’s overall a great way to eat together and enjoy your child’s teens.

 

Do not stalk them on social media

 

Would you like it if you found your parents reading your personal diary? In today’s internet age, I feel social media accounts of the teenagers are their personal diaries.

So, refrain from stalking all of their social media activities. There is no doubt we need to keep a watch on the time they spend on social media but gaining their trust is a better approach than finding about their social life by stalking them.  Do not give them a reason to think that you do not trust them. With the internet being an unsafe place, there is no doubt that you will be worried but you can install parenting control software on their devices after taking them into confidence rather than stalking them. I asked my preteen if she would allow me to send friend requests to her friends when she does have a social media account of her own, and she refused. So, do not send friend requests to their friends without discussing it first with them. Let them share the stories with you and enjoy listening to them rather than finding out about it through their social media.

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In my opinion, the right way to enjoying your child’s teenage years is to embrace it fully, keep communication a two-way process, have patience and keep your sense of humour intact.

This post is a part of My Friend Alexa Season 5 with Blogchatter

 

43 thoughts on “5 Tips To Enjoy Parenting Teens”

  1. This is such a great article Aesha.
    It is so important to spend more time with our teenagers than we did with our babies.
    It is important to show them our real selves and listen to them
    That is the only way to get them to listen to us.
    Spying or prying will never work.
    Nor will lecturing or controlling.
    if we understand that we can really have a wonderful time parenting our children through their teens

  2. Communication is certainly the key! We ensure that we are totally transparent in our communication and listen to what they need to say. They aren’t on SM yet, so no stalking till now 😛

  3. I feel very few parents give time to their kids..they are so involved in their careers 3SM pressure.. kids left alone on the internet is like a red flag in front of a red bull..yes communication is utmost important

  4. These are some amazing tips. I agree with you that parenting is indeed difficult when kids become teens. Giving them the needed their privacy becomes very important to them while we parents constantly worry about them spending the lone time. It indeed becomes very important to have a open and free communication.

  5. Parenting becomes difficult specially when kids hit the teens and adulthood. They need their privacy while parents cant stop spying. But I think that it’s always good to gve them space n be open with them to keep the doors of communication open.

  6. I think as and when our child enters each milestone years from baby to being a toddler, to being a teenager in later years. Its all about we as parents also growing with them and increasing the communication as well. Loved reading this post.

  7. I read every single word and absorbed it completely 😀 I am a mom of a teenager and there’s been no difference in opinion till now. I realise that this is the time to strengthen the bond rather than indulge in power tussels.

  8. I am so happy to hear your take on this. I often get clients who have teen kids and the challenges they face are for real. These points can help one build a happy and healthy relationship with the teens.

  9. I so agree with all your points, Aesha. My daughter is just 7 & I know there’s time. But going by how my mom treated me as a teenager, I totally get the understanding that a teen tends to develop with his/her parent. All that teens want is to be understood, empathized with & not to be judged or tamed. Excellently written!

  10. My daughter has just entered her teens and she is already rebelling about a lot of things. I tend to lose my cool but my wife tells me to calm down and tells me to take it easy. She also mentions that it is adolescence when children begin to get to know and understand a lot of things and as you say we need to let them discover themselves. All the point you have mentioned are valid. I share a lot of reading with my daughter and my wife makes sure that we have our meals together and it is gadget free.

  11. I noted down all the pointers, as a mom of tween age son I am preparing myself for teen parenting and your post is going to help me out in this.

  12. Excellent post Aesha. It is really not easy to be frnds with teen kids. They have their own perception towards their parents. If your daughter trusts you as a frnd, your efforts are commendable then.

  13. Loved to read this post. Being a mom of 10 year old I can completely relate with all the points you mentioned.

  14. Communication is a key role in communicating with them at this age. Parents also need to have an open mind. Very well written

  15. Stalking by parents online is annoying even for us adults, imagine how it must bug teens! I agree that communicating with them is easier but their mood swings are all over the place. Wonder how my experience would be.

  16. Dr. Surbhi Prapanna

    Great pointers Aesha and being a mommy of pre-teen, I can co relate with most of them. i agree spending quality time with kids is a great way to make a strong bond with them. and also making an open communication is must. it helps in understanding their problems better. great write up dear.

  17. You penned it right. Teens is age that requires two way communication and it is mandatory to win your child back

  18. hahahha dont stalk them on social media. thats a good one. its hard but im sure 80% parents are doing it because being online can be dangerous too.

  19. practicalmumnupur

    You know I’ve heard so many scary stories about kids of all ages! Terrible twos to fearsome fours to the most dreaded “teenage”… but providing kids with the attention they want seems to be the best solution to most issues. These tips are sure to work build strong bonds between parents and their teens.

    1. ?Why don’t you devise a software by which there is a way that we can monitor their activities so that they are safe but don’t feel that we do not trust them.

    1. Oh, wow! Thank you not I guess kids evolve so much after 11 years it will be a completely different generation. Having said that, I really value that you found my post so useful.

  20. As always, a frank, sensible and practical post by you. Aesha. Yes, stalking teens on SM is the worst thing you can do, as it annoys them like mad! Glad you added this point!

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