romance

R Is For Romance #DecodingMidlife

Romance is a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love.

When you think of Romance, do you only think about the teenagers in love, or dating couples or newly married couples?

I have this question. Does the excitement and romance in a relationship die down once we hit midlife?

As they say, ‘’Men get naughty at forty’’ but what about women.

I remember when I was dating during my early twenties, I would be so excited about our secret meetings. The anticipation, the eagerness and the pleasure of being together on romantic dates was something else.

Even after marriage, romantic life remained vibrant as now we had the legal approval of spending time together. There wasn’t any time deadline now. Those initial years after marriage was the best romantic times together.

Even after parenthood, we spent many romantic moments together. We would wait for our daughter to go off to sleep with her grandma and would go out for long drives or movies. We would wait for special moments in privacy. Life was wonderful. Such beautiful memories always stay with you all life -long, isn’t it?

 As our daughter grew older she demanded more of my time. Hubby got busy with work and career as responsibilities increased. Slowly there were fewer romantic moments. Now there are times when I just sleep before my husband returns from work. I do have a beautiful marriage. M Is For Marriage #DecodingMidlife Yet the tribulations and changes of midlife (mood swings, hormonal changes) would affect the romance in our lives. Having said that, I also know it is possible to keep the romance alive or rather fall in more and more in love with each other as the years go by.

 Here are few ways to rekindle romance and I will share those with you too.

  1. Say the three magical words, ‘I Love You’ more often. Don’t we like to hear them, it makes you feel attractive.
  2. Give a big hug daily.
  3. Flirt with your partner. Say sweet nothings. Write notes and send them along with lunch tiffin.
  4. Do what is important for your partner or spouse. Maybe an evening walk or just a coffee date. A candle night dinner or a dance night. Maybe preparing a favourite meal at home.
  5. Watch a romantic movie together.
  6. Plan a weekend getaway.
  7. Play your favourite soft music and go on long drives.
  8. Do something that you both love spontaneously.
  9. Compliment your partner in public.
  10. You don’t need to celebrate only anniversary or birthdate. You don’t need Valentine’s day to celebrate your love. Find any reason or excuse to celebrate.
  11. Share your fantasies with each other.
  12. Get nostalgic. Talk about the wonderful romantic memories of your past.

Often, we fail to explore cuddling, petting and other forms of intimacy as we get busy with our midlife chores. And that does affect the Romance in our lives. So, do share any other ideas to keep the romance alive during midlife which worked for you too.

I really liked this quote I read on Pinterest.

Don’t ever stop dating your wife and don’t ever stop flirting with your husband.”

 

 

 

 

16 comments

  1. For most of our engagement period and initial few months after marriage Nikhil was traveling. Then we had a baby soon, 15 months into marriage. I feel like we missed out on some of the newly wed romance. Hopefully once N is older and doesn’t need as much of our time we can find some time for ourselves to relive our newly wed phase 🙂

  2. I make my husband read this and he said “Achaa, tumhe ye sab ideas yaha se milte he” 😛
    We do almost every thing you mentioned. It is very important to love and keep loving as we age together.

  3. I loved the lines you have quoted…from PInterest. What happens is as midlife approaches coupled with its own share of issues, we tend to take our partner gor granted. Thats the time, we need to consciously begin to put in effort to create a magic around us. Small things, few words, thaey all make a bog diference.

  4. Romance is always in air, only difference is we fail to sniff it as the life gets busier. Thanks for compiling lovely pointers.

  5. Interesting. I feel a bit like a creepy scientist reading things like these, dissecting them so I can write good couples in fiction when I’m not feeling it in real life. Thank you for providing a good example, I guess? Seriously, this really is interesting and your advice makes a lot of good sense.

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