We keep saying parenting is exhausting but no one forced you, right? So, let’s make it fun and not feel pressurized.
Ok, I can say this because it’s almost 10 years now and I have learnt it the hard way – After cribbing about parenting and shedding numerous tears when the going got tough.
I am a stay at home mom so most of my time of the day is spent in the role of a mother. Mornings go in preparing breakfast and lunch. Afternoon goes in taking up studies, evenings go in pick up and drop to classes. In between all this madness, I have now a dedicated time for myself.
After 8:00 A.M, it’s me and my laptop. No one interferes. Other people at home know I am writing. I might not publish a post daily on the blog but that’s the time I am writing because Mishti is at school.
It’s only at 12:00 noon that I get up from the hot seat to eat lunch, finish the remaining household chores and then I spend my time in taking a nap; preparing myself for Mishti’s arrival from school because after this I will be running on the tick of the clock.
So, how I keep myself energized and look forward to the next morning with hope?
Here’s how-
I’ll tell you today about 3 ways I energize myself when I feel exhausted with parenting.
Exercise:
This is my favourite. I exercise daily so that daily chores and parenting duties do not become stressful. After dropping Mishti for her swim class in the evening, I head to the gym. I do not work out at home. Going to the gym is an opportunity for me to go out of the home, meet people- especially meet young people and workout with them. I miss my teaching days only because I miss the interaction with young people, going to the gym gives me that happiness. When one is approaching the 40’s, it’s always fun to be with people 10-15 years younger to you. I take it as a learning opportunity. I get to know about the new songs that are liked and loved by the millennials, the books they are reading, the new restaurants they are visiting (yes, we discuss food too while exercising) and many more things. Also, when I lift weights similar to them, when I see I have developed stamina and strength which is no less than them, it increases my confidence. I love myself more whenever I experience this.
I am not sure if you have checked my post on my CrossFit workout. If not, do click the hyperlink. (some boosting is allowed, right?)
Saturday movie date:
First, let’s talk about facts.
- Life in a metro is hectic.
- Parents do not have time to spend alone without kids.
- Homes in a city like Mumbai are small. So, there is a lack of privacy.
- Spouses are workaholics.
- A lot of travelling for work. Solo parenting is routine.
This is my life story. But I am not complaining. I treasure my Marriage and am enjoying each day. But to keep the romance brewing after more than 20 years of being in a relationship can be challenging. So, we devised a plan. Whenever hubby is in town on weekends (yes, like I said there is a lot of travelling for work) we go for a movie for the last show on Saturdays. We relive our dating years and those non-parenting years. And Sunday’s are for family because they need time with him too.
This way parenting and daughter in law duties do not become exhausting for me.
Spending time alone:
More than parenting all the other roles along with parenting makes parenting more exhausting. Because our kids become our punching bags. It’s easy to remove our frustrations on them because we feel powerful before them.
If you experience this, please introspect. I have gone through such emotional turmoil a few years ago. It spoils your relationship with the child, it hampers your child’s self-esteem and your child loses his trust in you.
So, whenever I feel lost, exhausted or unhappy, I leave home a bit early before I have to reach to pick up daughter from school, visit a mall, or grab a coffee and observe people around me. I need only 10-15 minutes to feel re-energized. So, once I am back home with her, I am happy and can get on with all the daily tasks.
I also have my books for a company and I know that my friends who are just a phone call away so that’s what I do when parenting takes up all my energies.
Pin it
What do you do? Tell me in comments, I could try it too.
This post is a part of Momology blog train hosted by Thoughts by Geethica, Slimexpectations, Mummasaurus and Truly Yours Roma sponsored by FirstCry Intellikit, Instacuppa, Diet Funda, Hugs n tugs, Tina Basu, Unorthodoxpeeps, Lotus Herbals baby and Shumee toys.
Read my first post in #momology series My Parenting Mantras for Pre-Teens
You can read about other ways to feel re-energised written for #momology blog train on Monika’s blog Alu Bhujia and Roopali’s blog Hello Momy
Until then,
Happy Parenting!
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I like to exercise although still have to push but it makes me happy! And kind of recharged me and my mood! ?Thanks for taking part in #Momology! ?
I understand where you come from when you say that its the parenting role along with other family roles that exhaust you and kids become a punching bag. Been there, done that. But then I realised how the child would understand only decades later, about my reasons for behaving in a particular manner. So I mend my manners. Yes, I think that’s the word and making time space for myself helped me get a better grip on my exhautive energy levels.
I could feel lot of positive vibes coming from your post Aesha. That first line is bang on. That is the root of any kind of frustration related to parenting. In fact not just parenting but almost for everything. If we understand there is no point in cribbing and getting upset when we ourselves have chosen that then I feel half of the problem is already taken care of.
I like to do some diy or listen to music/podcasts while I walk. And yes, talking to my friends always helps me in changing my mood.
#Momology
Thanks Alpana.
Fantastic one, Aesha.
A great ready reckoner for the Mommies on the go.
Thanks Natasha.
Such an honest post and I could relate with it so easily. indeed its hard to maintain an ounce of balance in completing multiple responsibilites. I really loved your list and agree exercise should be a part of ever one’s routine. it increases endorphin and make us feel good instantly. #Momolgy
Thanks Surbhi. I am glad you could relate to it. My blog is a reflection of who I am, so I am always write honestly and share my innermost feelings.
I think these tips work whether you are a mom or not. Now that my babes have flown and I am all alone with no hubby or kids to look after, I still need the energy to just face everyday.And exercise ,a date night with myself where I take myself off to the movies or for dinner, and time off from doing chores or writing is important. Just reading or dreaming.
It’s just awesome how you stay so positive and enjoy your own company. You know many people would crib about it. Thanks for sharing your thoughts Sunita . It feels good to be around positive people.
True Sunita, I guess we all need that time off to recharge and rejuvenate to keep our sanity intact. Kids or no kids. 🙂